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Title: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
Author: Stephen R. Covey
Review by: Vera Quinn, COO
Description of the book: These “Seven Habits” express a simple yet compelling idea: To be effective, we must adopt a principle-centered, character-based approach. We must work from the “inside-out,” guided by the habits that correspond with each stage along the “Maturity Continuum.”
Why should you read this? My copy of Stephen R. Covey’s The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People is signed by the author and constantly referenced. Most noticeable is that it is dog-eared, and well worn,—a sign not of neglect, but rather of its indispensability and enduring appeal over the years. I find its ideas as relevant and meaningful today, as when they were first introduced over 20 years ago.
At whatever stage along the path to maturity we may be, the “Seven Habits” offer us a powerful framework to solve problems, maximize opportunities, enrich relationships and continually learn and grow. For over two decades, the “Seven Habits” have given us the tools to create the lives, livelihoods and relationships we most desire—effective, productive and purposeful.
My favorite part: One passage in particular always strikes a chord:
“…[I]f you want to have a happy marriage, be the kind of person who generates positive energy and sidesteps negative energy rather than empowering it. If you want to have a more pleasant, cooperative teenager, be a more understanding, empathic, consistent, loving parent. If you want to have more freedom, more latitude in your job, be a more responsible, a more helpful, a more contributing employee. If you want to be trusted, be trustworthy. If you want the secondary greatness of recognized talent, focus first on primary greatness of character.”
What resonates is the premise that we must look within to find the change we seek and to become our best selves. We must first earn self-mastery and develop great character—what Covey calls achieving the “private victories.” Only then, can we achieve the “public victories” of teamwork, cooperation, communication, social recognition and influence. And to sustain this success, we must internalize “Seven Habits” that embody fundamental principles at the foundation of true effectiveness, such as fairness, integrity, honesty, dignity, service, quality, potential and growth.
Categor(y)(ies): Development, Entrepreneurship, Business Management
A team member who follows Stephen Covey on Twitter recently sent me one of his posts: “Leadership is communicating to people their worth and potential so clearly that they are inspired to see it in themselves. Are you such a leader?”
Covey’s post makes me think of The Wizard of Oz. Behind the smoke and mirrors, the Wizard is an ordinary man whose true power lies not in magic, but rather in his ability to help Dorothy, the Scarecrow, the Tin Man and the Lion see the innate strengths already within them. I am reminded to be just this type of leader, one who helps people believe in themselves and in their ability to accomplish what might at first glance seem out of reach.
As leaders, we must ask ourselves if we are inspiring our teams to live up to their own greatness. At times, they may have doubts that they have what it takes to succeed.
Our role is to help our people cultivate their full potential by investing in their development and nurturing their talents and aspirations. And as our people gain confidence and grow, our businesses, too, will grow with them.
Spring is a season of renewal and growth—and with that season nearly upon us – now is a perfect setting in which to reflect on our progress during the first few months of the New Year: how we’re tracking on our personal and professional goals, commitments and development plans.
At this timely moment, we’ve reached Covey’s seventh habit of effectiveness, “Sharpen the Saw.” In the spirit of reflection, it seems fitting to consider this final habit in the context of all the others before it.
“Sharpen the Saw” is a Quadrant 2 activity (important but not urgent) requiring time, initiative and pro-activity. It makes all the other habits possible when we practice self-renewal and self-improvement in four areas.
The first three are closely related to Habits 1, 2 and 3—the principles of personal vision, leadership and management. The fourth focuses on Habits 4, 5 and 6—the principles of interpersonal leadership, empathy and creative cooperation:
Physical: Caring effectively for our physical bodies through exercise, nutrition and stress-management
Spiritual: Renewing our commitment to our core values through spiritual reading, study and meditation
Mental: Honing and expanding our minds and discipline through education, reading, visualization, planning and writing
Social/emotional: Strengthening our relationships through service, empathy, synergy and good character
Habit 7 teaches us how to maintain a balance among these dimensions so that we can reach higher levels of understanding and effectiveness in our lives and relationships. According to Covey, it's all about preserving and enhancing our most important asset—ourselves—so that we can do and be our best:
By centering our lives on correct principles and creating a balanced focus between doing and increasing our ability to do, we become empowered in the task of creating effective, useful, and peaceful lives...for ourselves, and for our posterity.
Exercising the 7 Habits on a path of continuous growth and renewal helps us become more principled, more purposeful and more productive in ways that make a positive impact not only in our lives, but also in the lives of those around us. It’s a powerful lesson and aspiration for all of us—one I hope you’ll embrace, as I do.
– Vera
How many of us have had days where we can’t quite see eye to eye with anyone? A fight with our spouse or kids. A confrontation with the boss or a coworker. A business deal gone sour.
In my experience, it often boils down to communication or rather, poor communication. We talk at or over each other. Or if we can’t get a word in edgewise, we bide our time to interject our opinions and tit-for-tat responses. Or in anger and frustration, we say or do things we later regret and can’t take back.
But who really wins here? No one. As Habit 4 points out, adversarial conflict without a mutually beneficial resolution can quickly become a “lose-lose” proposition and a sure way to fail.
To reach “win-win” solutions in our interpersonal relations, we should look to Covey’s fifth habit: “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”
Habit 5 teaches us how to listen with the intent to understand, not to listen with the intent to reply. Effective listening is not simply echoing what the other person has said through the lens of our own experiences. Rather, it’s listening sincerely with our ears, eyes and heart. It’s listening with empathy to understand the other person emotionally and intellectually. Only then can we seek to be understood.
Covey uses the Greek philosophy of ethos, pathos and logos to describe the sequence for effective communication at the heart of Habit 5:
Following this sequence allows us to present our ideas clearly, specifically, visually and in the context of the other person’s perspective and concerns. And in doing so, we significantly increase not only the credibility of our ideas, but also their positive influence and impact.
– Jim
In business and in life, we talk a lot about winning in the context of competition or contests—of beating others to show we’re better at something. Winning means that someone else loses. It’s a “zero sum game.”
While a “win-lose” proposition has its time and place, I’ve found that most situations require a different approach. I recall something Coach John Wooden, a great man and influence in my life, once said: “Winning takes talent, to repeat takes character.”
Sure, winning can prove that we’re good or even the best at what we do. But to win in a meaningful and lasting way, we need to have character. For me, this means finding “win-win” opportunities that rely on cooperation and collaboration, rather than on competition and contests.
Covey’s fourth habit tells us just this—to “think win-win” by seeking mutual benefit from our interactions. While the first three habits are about mastering the “private victory” of independence, Habit 4 moves us into the realm of “public victories” or interdependence. It’s about developing effective interpersonal leadership, which is fundamental to all successful relationships.
Covey, like Coach Wooden, says that character is the foundation of winning. People and organizations with a “win-win” attitude have three key traits:
By practicing Habit 4, we can be true winners who work cooperatively with others to achieve mutual solutions, satisfaction and success. In situations where we can’t achieve a “win-win,” we must have the integrity, maturity and conviction—the character—to walk away agreeably without burning bridges. “Win-win” or no deals, rather than “win-lose” or “lose-lose” deals, are the best ways to be effective in our lives, work and most valued relationships.
– Gary
New Year‘s is a time to reflect on things we want (or need) to change, from getting fit or quitting smoking to getting a better job or spending more time with family. It’s a time to replace bad habits with good ones and to follow through on them.
How many of us, however, have made our resolutions with the best of intentions, only to break them weeks or months later? Perhaps more urgent matters crop up that consume our energies, leaving us too exhausted for anything else. Or perhaps we get discouraged with our progress and lose our desire and resolve to carry on. Whenever I face just such a dilemma, I look to Covey’s third habit, “Put First Things First,” for perspective and guidance.
While Habit 2 is about self-leadership, Habit 3 is about self-management. Leadership defines the "first things,” and management is the discipline to carry them out in accordance with our core principles. “Putting first things first” means we have the will to do something when we don't want to; to say “no” to some things (even seemingly urgent things); and to act on our values, rather than on impulse. Simply, it means focusing our time on what’s truly important.
According to Covey, we can spend our time in four ways:
Habit 3 tells us to spend most of our time in Quadrant 2, to minimize our time spent in Quadrant 1 and to stay out of Quadrants 3 and 4 altogether. In doing so, we pursue our highest priorities—the relationships and results that matter. Our crises would then become more manageable because we’re proactively doing the things that prevent them from happening in the first place.
For me, “putting first things first” is not only a habit of effectiveness, but also an act of integrity to our commitments and purpose. By honoring both, we position ourselves to seize the right opportunities at the right time—ones that can enrich our lives and livelihoods in the New Year and beyond.
- Vera Quinn
“To Begin with the End in Mind means to start with a clear understanding of your destination. It means to know where you're going so that you better understand where you are now and so that the steps you take are always in the right direction.”
The second habit of effectiveness, “Begin with the End in Mind,” is a favorite of mine. Covey points out how easy it is to get caught up in climbing the ladder of success only to discover that it’s leaning against the wrong wall. Effectiveness doesn’t depend solely on how much effort we expend, but on whether we expend the effort on the right things—something I’ve tried to remember in my personal and professional life.
To be effective, we must first be self-aware and critically examine how we view others and ourselves. Then, we must imagine or visualize our life’s purpose, which must be centered on a core of unchanging, “correct” principles. Finally, we must bring it into physical being, guided by our conscience and values. Doing so successfully allows us to demonstrate personal leadership, which means we take control and responsibility for our own lives.
My involvement with charities is one example of how I’ve applied Habit 2. The core principles of family, community and philanthropy underpin a personal mission to help those who are less fortunate, to give back to the community and to inspire compassion in others.
According to Covey, developing just such a mission is one way to begin with the end in mind. It focuses us on what we want to be (character) and do (contributions and achievements) and on the principles that guide our being and doing. When we ensure every decision and action is congruent with that mission, we practice Habit 2 successfully and become more effective people—and leaders.
Jim Majeski
My copy of Stephen R. Covey’s The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People is signed by the author and constantly referenced. Most noticeable is that it is dog-eared, and well worn,—a sign not of neglect, but rather of its indispensability and enduring appeal over the years. I find its ideas as relevant and meaningful today, as when they were first introduced over 20 years ago.
One passage in particular always strikes a chord:
“…[I]f you want to have a happy marriage, be the kind of person who generates positive energy and sidesteps negative energy rather than empowering it. If you want to have a more pleasant, cooperative teenager, be a more understanding, empathic, consistent, loving parent. If you want to have more freedom, more latitude in your job, be a more responsible, a more helpful, a more contributing employee. If you want to be trusted, be trustworthy. If you want the secondary greatness of recognized talent, focus first on primary greatness of character.”
What resonates is the premise that we must look within to find the change we seek and to become our best selves. We must first earn self-mastery and develop great character—what Covey calls achieving the “private victories.” Only then, can we achieve the "public victories" of teamwork, cooperation, communication, social recognition and influence. And to sustain this success, we must internalize “Seven Habits” that embody fundamental principles at the foundation of true effectiveness, such as fairness, integrity, honesty, dignity, service, quality, potential and growth.
These “Seven Habits” express a simple yet compelling idea: To be effective, we must adopt a principle-centered, character-based approach. We must work from the “inside-out,” guided by the habits that correspond with each stage along the “Maturity Continuum.”
Habits 1 (Be Proactive), 2 (Begin with the End in Mind) and 3 (Put First Things First) make up the private victories that move us from dependence on circumstances and other people to greater independence, self-reliance and personal accountability. These first three habits help us build the character base from which we can progress to interdependence, the stage when we cooperate and work successfully with others to attain “public victories” that are greater than anything we could accomplish independently. All of the Habits are just that, habits and principles that we can incorporate in our daily lives through discipline.
Habit 7, “Sharpen the Saw,” makes all the other habits possible through self-renewal and continuous improvement. This habit focuses on balancing the doing with our ability and capacity to do, so we preserve and enhance our most valuable asset—us.
At whatever stage along the path to maturity we may be, the “Seven Habits” offer us a powerful framework to solve problems, maximize opportunities, enrich relationships and continually learn and grow. For over two decades, the “Seven Habits” have given us the tools to create the lives, livelihoods and relationships we most desire—effective, productive and purposeful.
Each of the Seven Habits will be the topic of our blog for the next several weeks. Focusing on these is in itself a good habit.
- Vera Quinn